You probably assume you’re a very responsible person. Most of us do!
Yet you might be surprised to discover the places where you drop your responsibility without realizing it, and how it wreaks havoc on your life!
Take this little test. Think of the last time you showed up late to a business meeting, a lunch, or a dinner party. When you got there, you probably responded in one of three ways.
You either tried to shift the blame, justify your late arrival, or shamed yourself as penance. Let’s dig into these!
If you’re a blame-shifter, you may have said that it was traffic or your partner who held you up.
If you’re a justifier, you may have complained about your hectic life or told the other person how they’re often late.
If you’re a self-shamer, you may have said how terrible you feel or what a screw-up you are. This is a sneaky ploy to get the other person to tell you it’s all okay.
In contrast, highly successful people respond very differently.
When they are late, rather than using blame, justifying, or shame, they look the other person squarely in the eye and apologize without shame.
They own that they didn’t leave early enough. In addition, they often include an act of service to show their sincerity. They may pay for lunch or help clean up after the party.
By assuming full responsibility for everything in their lives, successful people stand out as being uniquely trustworthy and likable.
But, more importantly, this level of responsibility empowers them to create massive change in their world whenever needed.
Our difficulty in being responsible goes back to childhood. When we made mistakes, we were punished and humiliated. Taking responsibility meant inviting that pain on ourselves.
So we developed tools of blame, justifying, and shaming to avoid feeling hurt.
Yet, now, it’s your responsibility to overwrite that programming! So if you wish to take on this challenge, here are three easy steps.
Step One: When running late, take note of your thoughts and feelings.
Are you anxious that someone might be angry, or you may get into trouble? Keep in mind that those worries are holdovers from childhood. Remind yourself that you’re safe and can handle any problem.
Step Two: Think about the exact moment when your choices (not anyone else) caused you to be late.
If you can’t pinpoint it, just imagine what you may have done differently if you were to receive $10,000 for being on time. You’ll quickly see where being late was 100% your responsibility.
Step Three: Apologize clearly and without any self-judgment.
Say, “I’m sorry for being late. I didn’t make getting here on time a priority. But you can count on me to keep my word from now on.” Imagine their admiration for you in making such a bold statement!
Bonus Suggestion: Carry some $5.00 coffee cards with you at all times.
When you’re late, apologize and hand them a card. Say that you’d like to buy their next cup of coffee as a make-up for wasting their time. They will be shocked and delighted! Moreover, you have earned back their trust in the integrity of your word (for just $5.00!)Highly-regarded successful people, by their nature, take full responsibility for everything in their lives. In doing so, they create the exact life that they want. While hard work and determination are vital for being an entrepreneur, taking responsibility is essential for your success!
If this has been helpful, you can download this and all my tools for success by just texting the word SUCCESS to my personal cell phone 213-409-8366.
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